Practice #42 - Loafing and Inviting the Soul

1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:08,480 So I'm reading a book called The Power of Personal Storytelling. 2 00:00:08,480 --> 00:00:14,400 And I told myself before I started reading it that I was going to read or that I was 3 00:00:14,400 --> 00:00:19,960 going to take action and implement every single thing he says in that book. 4 00:00:19,960 --> 00:00:27,280 And this is because I am working on storytelling right now and I really want to get it better 5 00:00:27,280 --> 00:00:32,080 because I know that storytelling is one of the most valuable skills that you can have 6 00:00:32,080 --> 00:00:41,680 as a person, as a professional in pretty much any career, and as a YouTuber, and for the 7 00:00:41,680 --> 00:00:44,080 goals that I'm pursuing. 8 00:00:44,080 --> 00:00:50,520 And so another thing that I'd said is I'm not going to read on, so I'm not going to 9 00:00:50,520 --> 00:00:55,520 continue reading on the book until I complete the actionable step that he gives. 10 00:00:55,520 --> 00:01:03,480 Because at the end of every single chapter he gives me a, he writes down actionable steps. 11 00:01:03,480 --> 00:01:09,400 And so I basically have a rule for myself where I finish every single actionable step 12 00:01:09,400 --> 00:01:11,040 and then I can move on. 13 00:01:11,040 --> 00:01:16,680 And usually because of this, I have to stop reading and then go and do it and then I can't 14 00:01:16,680 --> 00:01:18,480 read until the next day. 15 00:01:18,480 --> 00:01:23,880 So I'm like at this pace right now I'm getting one or two chapters in a day. 16 00:01:23,880 --> 00:01:27,680 So it's probably going to take me like two or three weeks to finish this like 200 page 17 00:01:27,680 --> 00:01:31,640 book, which should be a quick read, but it's going to take me a lot longer because I'm 18 00:01:31,640 --> 00:01:37,880 taking action, which is good because I'm putting in, I'm going to get out of it what I put 19 00:01:37,880 --> 00:01:39,560 into it. 20 00:01:39,560 --> 00:01:45,520 But one of the most recent things that he said to do, and I'm sorry if I sound weird 21 00:01:45,520 --> 00:01:50,000 right now, it's because I'm literally shivering because it's freezing in the basement. 22 00:01:50,000 --> 00:01:59,480 But one of the things that he said to do is something that I never actually did before. 23 00:01:59,480 --> 00:02:03,800 And it's basically a exercise to reconnect with your past. 24 00:02:03,800 --> 00:02:11,080 And I benefit so much from this because I had such a negative relationship with my past 25 00:02:11,080 --> 00:02:21,680 because I grew so much in my like from since sophomore year of my high school until now 26 00:02:21,680 --> 00:02:27,160 that and then I was doing a lot of bad habits in middle school. 27 00:02:27,160 --> 00:02:32,920 And I kind of just thought badly of pretty much my entire childhood because of what I 28 00:02:32,920 --> 00:02:37,360 was doing in middle school, which was just playing video games all day. 29 00:02:37,360 --> 00:02:43,920 But this exercise was basically you just sit down in a dark, quiet, peaceful environment. 30 00:02:43,920 --> 00:02:50,520 So I basically just sat down in my room, which was dark, and I couldn't hear anyone and there's 31 00:02:50,520 --> 00:02:52,800 no distractions. 32 00:02:52,800 --> 00:02:57,280 And you just you just think back to your childhood. 33 00:02:57,280 --> 00:03:02,480 He said that you can have broad just general childhood, or you can think about a specific 34 00:03:02,480 --> 00:03:06,400 incident or a specific year or a specific event. 35 00:03:06,400 --> 00:03:13,560 And then on the next chapter, the next chapter is actual step, which I ended up reading after 36 00:03:13,560 --> 00:03:19,120 I completed this one that I'm going to tell you right now was basically the same exercise, 37 00:03:19,120 --> 00:03:25,760 except you don't necessarily think back in general terms, you think back in feelings. 38 00:03:25,760 --> 00:03:28,960 So you try and think like, when was I feeling inspired? 39 00:03:28,960 --> 00:03:31,520 Or when was I feeling courageous? 40 00:03:31,520 --> 00:03:36,320 Or you can think back in thinking, which I didn't really understand the difference between 41 00:03:36,320 --> 00:03:38,720 thinking back and thinking and just thinking back. 42 00:03:38,720 --> 00:03:39,960 I don't know. 43 00:03:39,960 --> 00:03:46,880 But I did both of the I did both of the actual steps right after I read them. 44 00:03:46,880 --> 00:03:50,040 And oh my gosh, it is freezing. 45 00:03:50,040 --> 00:03:54,360 Okay, I did both the actual steps right after I read them. 46 00:03:54,360 --> 00:03:59,720 And I discovered something amazing. 47 00:03:59,720 --> 00:04:02,320 First of all, I discovered that I got to keep doing this. 48 00:04:02,320 --> 00:04:08,320 And as a result, I've swapped out my like meditation with this, like I'm doing this instead of 49 00:04:08,320 --> 00:04:13,960 meditating every day, which I think it's very beneficial for me right now. 50 00:04:13,960 --> 00:04:19,800 And so what I discovered was that my childhood was not trash. 51 00:04:19,800 --> 00:04:23,200 Like my childhood was amazing. 52 00:04:23,200 --> 00:04:29,960 And one thing that I told that I tend to tell people if they ask, when I started self-improvement, 53 00:04:29,960 --> 00:04:35,560 I tend to say I started self-improvement the beginning of junior year or like the beginning 54 00:04:35,560 --> 00:04:38,960 of sophomore year, depending on like what I'm feeling that day. 55 00:04:38,960 --> 00:04:41,360 Because beginning of junior year is when I started reading. 56 00:04:41,360 --> 00:04:45,280 But the beginning of sophomore year was when I actually started, well, actually it was 57 00:04:45,280 --> 00:04:50,880 like the beginning of freshman year was when I actually started doing like exercise, exercising 58 00:04:50,880 --> 00:04:53,000 and stuff like that. 59 00:04:53,000 --> 00:04:56,840 Or it was maybe even before the beginning of freshman year. 60 00:04:56,840 --> 00:05:05,520 But pretty much I always thought that I started self-improvement on the beginning of junior 61 00:05:05,520 --> 00:05:09,200 year, literally like one and a half years ago. 62 00:05:09,200 --> 00:05:15,240 But what I realized was I actually have been on self-improvement pretty much my entire life. 63 00:05:15,240 --> 00:05:19,840 I've been doing like little things to improve myself all the time. 64 00:05:19,840 --> 00:05:25,800 And I just discredited everything that I did before then because of what I was doing in 65 00:05:25,800 --> 00:05:29,440 middle school, which was just being addicted to video games and playing video games all 66 00:05:29,440 --> 00:05:31,080 the time. 67 00:05:31,080 --> 00:05:37,560 But one of the most important things that I came to understand about myself was I was 68 00:05:37,560 --> 00:05:42,200 just trying to look, I was just thinking about just a broad childhood. 69 00:05:42,200 --> 00:05:48,440 And I like over the course of 30 minutes that I was doing it, a bunch of just images and 70 00:05:48,440 --> 00:05:51,400 flashes came to mind. 71 00:05:51,400 --> 00:05:56,120 And there was three very important points that I remembered. 72 00:05:56,120 --> 00:06:04,000 And it's three things that I'm kind of, or two of the things I'm really working on, 73 00:06:04,000 --> 00:06:08,000 which is courage and, let me actually check, I forgot. 74 00:06:08,000 --> 00:06:10,560 Yeah, courage and leadership. 75 00:06:10,560 --> 00:06:14,480 So two of the things I'm really working on right now is courage and leadership. 76 00:06:14,480 --> 00:06:20,960 But one of the things, the third one that I was working on a little bit before was like 77 00:06:20,960 --> 00:06:26,320 talking to girls and being confident around girls and all that, which I was working on 78 00:06:26,320 --> 00:06:32,720 that a little bit during summer when I was going to the mall and just cold approaching. 79 00:06:32,720 --> 00:06:40,400 But I kind of just narrowed in and focused on myself instead of just focused on girls, 80 00:06:40,400 --> 00:06:42,000 which I wasn't even doing it for the girls. 81 00:06:42,000 --> 00:06:43,600 I was doing it for myself, whatever. 82 00:06:43,600 --> 00:06:45,000 That's a whole story on itself. 83 00:06:45,000 --> 00:06:49,680 If you're interested, go back to like episode 21 on the podcast and you can listen to it 84 00:06:49,680 --> 00:06:50,680 in real time. 85 00:06:50,680 --> 00:06:54,200 It might be 21, it might be 22, I don't know. 86 00:06:54,200 --> 00:06:55,480 It might be 20, I don't know. 87 00:06:55,480 --> 00:06:56,480 Just check those. 88 00:06:56,480 --> 00:07:05,840 But pretty much I was listening back to my, or I was, okay, I was remembering back to 89 00:07:05,840 --> 00:07:09,080 three different events. 90 00:07:09,080 --> 00:07:13,760 So three different kind of memories popped up into my mind. 91 00:07:13,760 --> 00:07:18,880 And the first one taught me that I am like a natural leader. 92 00:07:18,880 --> 00:07:22,880 And this is something important because I was really told that I was a leader all my 93 00:07:22,880 --> 00:07:28,640 life, but I always just kind of discredited that and thought that I thought like negative 94 00:07:28,640 --> 00:07:29,640 towards that. 95 00:07:29,640 --> 00:07:33,080 I thought that they were just saying that just because, and I didn't really feel like 96 00:07:33,080 --> 00:07:34,560 a leader. 97 00:07:34,560 --> 00:07:41,160 But I was thinking back and I saw, and I remember how in elementary school, I was like the most 98 00:07:41,160 --> 00:07:45,040 popular kid in the grade. 99 00:07:45,040 --> 00:07:48,400 I was one of the most popular kids in the grade. 100 00:07:48,400 --> 00:07:49,840 I didn't do that on purpose. 101 00:07:49,840 --> 00:07:51,120 I wasn't trying to do that. 102 00:07:51,120 --> 00:07:52,120 I was just chilling. 103 00:07:52,120 --> 00:07:54,160 I was just being myself. 104 00:07:54,160 --> 00:08:02,680 And I just, the memory that came back to me was me literally walking around the playground, 105 00:08:02,680 --> 00:08:09,000 leading a small army of children just around the playground. 106 00:08:09,000 --> 00:08:13,120 That was just like a memory that I had from elementary school. 107 00:08:13,120 --> 00:08:19,240 I would literally just walk around and lead a small army of children, like 10, 15 kids. 108 00:08:19,240 --> 00:08:20,240 I don't know. 109 00:08:20,240 --> 00:08:21,240 It was crazy. 110 00:08:21,240 --> 00:08:25,320 But I mean, obviously that didn't happen all the time, but that was just like one event. 111 00:08:25,320 --> 00:08:31,640 And so that's like me, it's me reminding myself that I actually am a leader. 112 00:08:31,640 --> 00:08:33,520 I'm like, I'm a natural born leader. 113 00:08:33,520 --> 00:08:40,880 And it gives me the confidence to continue on with this YouTube channel because the last 114 00:08:40,880 --> 00:08:46,640 time I checked the analytics on the YouTube, I have like, I think 70 subscribers or 80 115 00:08:46,640 --> 00:08:52,760 subscribers, which is not that much compared to most YouTubers, like people, YouTubers 116 00:08:52,760 --> 00:08:56,360 that I follow have like millions of subscribers. 117 00:08:56,360 --> 00:09:03,160 But if you put it into context, I have 80 people following me. 118 00:09:03,160 --> 00:09:10,840 And if you see that in real life, like I remember that memory looking back, I had 15 119 00:09:10,840 --> 00:09:16,320 tiny children following me and I felt like the king of the world. 120 00:09:16,320 --> 00:09:20,320 And that like that's teachers in school. 121 00:09:20,320 --> 00:09:25,760 They have, they're leading 20 kids, their leaders, and they feel good about themselves 122 00:09:25,760 --> 00:09:29,800 because that I have 80 people. 123 00:09:29,800 --> 00:09:34,760 Like if you look at like just try and visualize what 80 people looks like. 124 00:09:34,760 --> 00:09:40,800 So if you're a high school student or if you remember high school, just think about that 125 00:09:40,800 --> 00:09:45,240 that's like four classrooms full of kids. 126 00:09:45,240 --> 00:09:49,520 So I'm leading four classrooms full of people. 127 00:09:49,520 --> 00:09:51,800 So that's something amazing to think about. 128 00:09:51,800 --> 00:09:59,400 And I originally came to that epiphany of like realizing that I'm leading a lot of people, 129 00:09:59,400 --> 00:10:04,600 even though I only have like 50 subscribers back when I was taking a walk a couple weeks 130 00:10:04,600 --> 00:10:05,600 ago. 131 00:10:05,600 --> 00:10:08,880 And I just randomly thought about that because I kind of felt bad. 132 00:10:08,880 --> 00:10:14,960 I think it was my how to get jacked as a high school student, which I changed to how to build 133 00:10:14,960 --> 00:10:16,760 an aesthetic body. 134 00:10:16,760 --> 00:10:18,240 That video didn't do as well. 135 00:10:18,240 --> 00:10:24,720 So I was kind of like disappointed one week after because I didn't realize I don't check 136 00:10:24,720 --> 00:10:26,880 analytics until one week after. 137 00:10:26,880 --> 00:10:32,060 So one week after I posted that video, I was a little disappointed. 138 00:10:32,060 --> 00:10:38,520 And so I went on a walk to like re whatever to re inspire myself. 139 00:10:38,520 --> 00:10:42,640 And I actually discovered that going on a walk and coming up with more brainstorming 140 00:10:42,640 --> 00:10:48,560 ideas and all that and getting excited again, that is so powerful if you are like in a low 141 00:10:48,560 --> 00:10:53,000 mood because I left for that walk really low mood. 142 00:10:53,000 --> 00:10:58,240 And I came back just really hype and excited to start working on the channel again. 143 00:10:58,240 --> 00:11:03,800 But I basically came up with that epiphany that I have like 50 subscribers. 144 00:11:03,800 --> 00:11:06,120 That's 50 people following me. 145 00:11:06,120 --> 00:11:10,160 I can barely even visualize what 50 people look like. 146 00:11:10,160 --> 00:11:21,680 And so that's the first trait that I was reminded of that I have like I am a leader. 147 00:11:21,680 --> 00:11:27,560 And then another trait that I was reminded of is that I am courageous. 148 00:11:27,560 --> 00:11:32,520 And over the past couple months especially like or especially when I started getting 149 00:11:32,520 --> 00:11:39,720 into entrepreneurship like the past six months maybe, I've been taking a lot of courageous 150 00:11:39,720 --> 00:11:41,220 leaps. 151 00:11:41,220 --> 00:11:51,760 Like some notable things were when I first started the pot or when I first filed my business 152 00:11:51,760 --> 00:11:58,680 under like the like when I first filed for my business to become like legit. 153 00:11:58,680 --> 00:12:00,360 That was really scary for me. 154 00:12:00,360 --> 00:12:08,200 I literally spent an entire week writing down in my journal pros and cons because I just 155 00:12:08,200 --> 00:12:10,340 was so scared to do it. 156 00:12:10,340 --> 00:12:13,080 Even though it was nothing like there was no consequence. 157 00:12:13,080 --> 00:12:19,160 There was no like the only consequence was losing $150 which is the cost to file for 158 00:12:19,160 --> 00:12:21,160 LLC. 159 00:12:21,160 --> 00:12:24,440 But I was just so terrified. 160 00:12:24,440 --> 00:12:26,480 That was like one of the bigger courageous things. 161 00:12:26,480 --> 00:12:31,680 And another one was like the first time I called approached a girl in the mall. 162 00:12:31,680 --> 00:12:33,720 That like was actually terrifying. 163 00:12:33,720 --> 00:12:37,880 And there was a bunch of other courageous events that I had, but I just had to remind 164 00:12:37,880 --> 00:12:45,360 myself that like I have always been courageous because I remembered or not necessarily always 165 00:12:45,360 --> 00:12:49,960 been courageous, but I've like it gave me a new perspective, this memory that I'll tell 166 00:12:49,960 --> 00:12:51,120 you in a moment. 167 00:12:51,120 --> 00:13:01,600 It gave me a new perspective of how courage is basically just a choice and how you can 168 00:13:01,600 --> 00:13:07,040 make the most courageous decision without much training. 169 00:13:07,040 --> 00:13:14,360 Because I've had like, for example, when I filed my business, I remember how that felt. 170 00:13:14,360 --> 00:13:16,080 I was like so scared. 171 00:13:16,080 --> 00:13:22,120 I had that same feeling when I was asked like when I called approached a girl and asked 172 00:13:22,120 --> 00:13:24,440 her for a number at the mall. 173 00:13:24,440 --> 00:13:29,800 And then I also had that same feeling now that I remember from this memory that I'm 174 00:13:29,800 --> 00:13:31,360 going to tell you right now. 175 00:13:31,360 --> 00:13:34,440 And it was back when I was like really young. 176 00:13:34,440 --> 00:13:38,160 I was probably like seven or eight or 10 maybe. 177 00:13:38,160 --> 00:13:39,920 I don't know. 178 00:13:39,920 --> 00:13:42,240 I was pretty, I was younger. 179 00:13:42,240 --> 00:13:43,240 Maybe I was 11 or 12. 180 00:13:43,240 --> 00:13:44,400 I don't know. 181 00:13:44,400 --> 00:13:47,120 I was a shy kid. 182 00:13:47,120 --> 00:13:57,640 I still am shy, but I was shy and my dad, his job requires him to go on to an assignment 183 00:13:57,640 --> 00:14:04,200 every summer, which is basically where he works at a summer camp for an entire month. 184 00:14:04,200 --> 00:14:12,880 So my childhood, a lot of summers I spent my a lot of summers during my childhood. 185 00:14:12,880 --> 00:14:19,000 I spent at a summer camp, which was absolutely amazing, by the way. 186 00:14:19,000 --> 00:14:21,840 Like that was probably some of the best times I had ever. 187 00:14:21,840 --> 00:14:27,200 And I was reminded of them during this exercise also, which I kind of forgot about. 188 00:14:27,200 --> 00:14:33,840 So if you, okay, side tangent, you should definitely practice this exercise of literally 189 00:14:33,840 --> 00:14:37,500 just trying to remember your childhood because it is so fulfilling. 190 00:14:37,500 --> 00:14:41,840 It's actually one of the most crazy inner work things that I've ever done and most rewarding 191 00:14:41,840 --> 00:14:44,480 inner work done things that I've ever done. 192 00:14:44,480 --> 00:14:51,940 But I'm at this summer camp and I know and over the past like couple years at summer 193 00:14:51,940 --> 00:14:56,600 camp I've always had friends and that made it amazing. 194 00:14:56,600 --> 00:15:03,680 Now that I remember, I think that I was probably like 11 or 12 or 13 when I, when this memory 195 00:15:03,680 --> 00:15:05,800 happened. 196 00:15:05,800 --> 00:15:13,360 And so I knew that having friends during this summer camp, during this month, other staff 197 00:15:13,360 --> 00:15:20,120 kids that were there for an entire month, that made the time so much better. 198 00:15:20,120 --> 00:15:25,920 And there was one, there was one other kid my age and then one other kid, like probably 199 00:15:25,920 --> 00:15:29,320 like four or five years younger than us. 200 00:15:29,320 --> 00:15:30,840 And they were hanging out together. 201 00:15:30,840 --> 00:15:32,920 They already knew each other. 202 00:15:32,920 --> 00:15:37,280 And I basically, I knew that they were there. 203 00:15:37,280 --> 00:15:42,000 Like I saw them at camp, but I was always too afraid and shy to walk up to them and 204 00:15:42,000 --> 00:15:44,000 just start being friends. 205 00:15:44,000 --> 00:15:48,800 And this was back when we were young enough, like we were young to where it was as simple 206 00:15:48,800 --> 00:15:52,360 as literally just walking up to them and say, Hey, can we be friends? 207 00:15:52,360 --> 00:15:58,200 Like that's how simple, like if you remember that's how simple it is to be friends in when 208 00:15:58,200 --> 00:16:02,360 you're young, which I'm questioning, why isn't it that simple now? 209 00:16:02,360 --> 00:16:05,800 Are we just making it more difficult on ourselves? 210 00:16:05,800 --> 00:16:07,000 Maybe that's an experiment. 211 00:16:07,000 --> 00:16:12,440 Maybe I should walk up to a random person the next time I like, am at like that kind 212 00:16:12,440 --> 00:16:16,640 of next time I see someone, maybe I should do that and just say, Hey, can we be friends? 213 00:16:16,640 --> 00:16:18,200 That'd be a cool experiment. 214 00:16:18,200 --> 00:16:19,200 I don't know. 215 00:16:19,200 --> 00:16:25,000 But pretty much that'd be a cool comfort zone challenge also because that's out of my comfort 216 00:16:25,000 --> 00:16:26,000 zone. 217 00:16:26,000 --> 00:16:31,240 But I walk or we're, and then, okay, so we're at suburb camp. 218 00:16:31,240 --> 00:16:38,000 I've seen this guy around and all of these moments I've missed, like I had plenty of 219 00:16:38,000 --> 00:16:41,600 opportunities to walk up to him and say, Hey, can we be friends? 220 00:16:41,600 --> 00:16:46,040 And then this one day we are like me, I'm okay. 221 00:16:46,040 --> 00:16:52,400 So we're sitting in the main entrance of the camp, like the lobby area. 222 00:16:52,400 --> 00:17:00,320 And I'm sitting across the room from him and he is just on his phone or he's playing on 223 00:17:00,320 --> 00:17:07,440 like a electronic device with his friend, which was the younger guy. 224 00:17:07,440 --> 00:17:13,080 And so I'm just sitting there just kind of sitting on super scared, super nervous, super 225 00:17:13,080 --> 00:17:14,080 shy. 226 00:17:14,080 --> 00:17:18,680 And then I'm just like, Oh, and there's no adults in the room, by the way, which is probably 227 00:17:18,680 --> 00:17:22,960 why I mustered or probably how I mustered the courage to actually make the move because 228 00:17:22,960 --> 00:17:25,840 I never would have made the move if my parents were there. 229 00:17:25,840 --> 00:17:27,360 I don't know why. 230 00:17:27,360 --> 00:17:35,800 I always like question why I'm less courageous around my parents, but I don't know. 231 00:17:35,800 --> 00:17:38,520 I made the move. 232 00:17:38,520 --> 00:17:39,680 I decided to make the move. 233 00:17:39,680 --> 00:17:42,680 I'm like, okay, it's now or never, like I got to do this. 234 00:17:42,680 --> 00:17:48,160 Like I know that this is going to make my month, my summer camp experience so much better. 235 00:17:48,160 --> 00:17:52,640 So I made the move and that was probably one of the more difficult things that I'd done 236 00:17:52,640 --> 00:18:01,360 at that point in my life and it ended up being the best summer camp experience that I'd had 237 00:18:01,360 --> 00:18:04,560 probably ever up to that point. 238 00:18:04,560 --> 00:18:10,560 So that is me remembering that I'm courageous. 239 00:18:10,560 --> 00:18:14,760 And then the third thing was me remembering that I am good with girls. 240 00:18:14,760 --> 00:18:18,160 Like I am a natural ladies man. 241 00:18:18,160 --> 00:18:23,360 And it's when I was in elementary school, two, I don't, it's probably more occasions 242 00:18:23,360 --> 00:18:31,000 than this, but two occasions that I can remember in second grade, I sat next to like my desk 243 00:18:31,000 --> 00:18:34,440 was sitting next to like three other people. 244 00:18:34,440 --> 00:18:36,320 And then one of them was this one girl. 245 00:18:36,320 --> 00:18:40,240 And I just remember like always being very friendly with her. 246 00:18:40,240 --> 00:18:43,800 And then another time was in like fourth grade or third grade. 247 00:18:43,800 --> 00:18:51,720 I don't remember what years, but I was super friendly with another girl. 248 00:18:51,720 --> 00:18:57,800 And there was lots of like memories that I have of like just being comfortable around 249 00:18:57,800 --> 00:18:58,920 them. 250 00:18:58,920 --> 00:19:05,080 And so that's why I'm reminded that like I can be comfortable around girls and be very 251 00:19:05,080 --> 00:19:07,600 like friendly. 252 00:19:07,600 --> 00:19:16,240 And so that is pretty much the exercise that I went through yesterday, literally just sitting 253 00:19:16,240 --> 00:19:19,440 in my room and trying to remember my childhood. 254 00:19:19,440 --> 00:19:26,360 Like I didn't have the goal to think of different like traits that I had as a child that I have 255 00:19:26,360 --> 00:19:27,560 now. 256 00:19:27,560 --> 00:19:30,720 My goal was simply just to remember my childhood. 257 00:19:30,720 --> 00:19:38,080 And then like I sat in my room, my room is set up to where it can get pitch black if 258 00:19:38,080 --> 00:19:46,000 I want to because I nailed blackout curtains on the window and the doors door. 259 00:19:46,000 --> 00:19:52,960 And so I literally just sat in my room, turned the light off and set the timer for 35 minutes 260 00:19:52,960 --> 00:19:58,240 and literally just sat there on my bed thinking, what can I do? 261 00:19:58,240 --> 00:20:00,080 Or not not thinking that. 262 00:20:00,080 --> 00:20:04,760 I was literally just thinking, what was my childhood like? 263 00:20:04,760 --> 00:20:08,280 Like that was literally my broad question. 264 00:20:08,280 --> 00:20:12,000 And then I literally just let my mind race with different memories. 265 00:20:12,000 --> 00:20:14,960 And they didn't come spewing out by the way. 266 00:20:14,960 --> 00:20:19,480 Like they literally, it took probably like five minutes to warm up. 267 00:20:19,480 --> 00:20:26,040 And I've conditioned myself to be able to sit in silence over the past couple, over the 268 00:20:26,040 --> 00:20:30,880 past half of a year, so I'm able to do this. 269 00:20:30,880 --> 00:20:35,520 You might have a more difficult experience, but it's definitely worth it. 270 00:20:35,520 --> 00:20:37,440 So do that. 271 00:20:37,440 --> 00:20:43,520 I'm pretty sure it's called like Lothine and Inviting the Soul or something like that. 272 00:20:43,520 --> 00:20:50,080 If you just get the book, it's called The Power of Personal Storytelling by Jack Maguire. 273 00:20:50,080 --> 00:20:53,200 It's like chapter five or six or something like that. 274 00:20:53,200 --> 00:20:54,200 I don't know. 275 00:20:54,200 --> 00:20:55,360 Just read the book. 276 00:20:55,360 --> 00:20:58,360 I'm like not even a fourth of what I've done. 277 00:20:58,360 --> 00:21:00,920 And it's already changed my life. 278 00:21:00,920 --> 00:21:02,440 And it's because I'm taking action. 279 00:21:02,440 --> 00:21:28,480 So take action.